Thursday, May 31, 2007


The most astounding event of the day:
Amoryn fell asleep at midnight, and I really believed her & went to bed myself at 12:30. She slept until 6:40 am. The man's alarm clock went off* before she did! Yay!
Especially since she's being going through a phase/growth spurt where she howls in rage about many, many things when she is awake. Coupled with wanting food every 2 1/2 - 3 hours, with at least a zillion minutes (it seemed) of howling, angry, gum-bared, tongue-vibrating rage before, during, & after each meal. (I know maaaaany mothers have/had it much worse. I'm just trying to explain how exciting this sleep was.) (And Gramma Jeanne, who had 7 babies, did remark that she didn't remember any of her babies being like that.) (Of course, that was a while ago, and after the second or third baby, would you really be focused enough to remember? With the sleep deprivation & mutlitasking & all?) (And yes, we run through the hungry? dirty? burpy? farty? hot? bored? tired? routine. AND NONE OF IT, NOT EVEN GRIPE WATER, WORKS. The girls's just mad, is all, & has to let it out.) (But I digress.)
Anyways! My beautiful girl gave me six hours of sleep! All in a row!
We celebrated by having a nap together.
(We don't co-sleep. Amoryn sleeps by herself nights in her crib, & days in her playpen or swing. But some mornings, forspecial, we nap together in the big bed.)
*Sign me up for schadenfreude**, but DAMN, it felt good to watch somebody else get out of bed, because they had to, before I had to. Hahaha.
**scha·den·freu·de (noun) satisfaction or pleasure felt at someone else's misfortune.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Definitive Proof

I have a little girl.

The serger thread removes all doubt.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Hee Hee Hee!

I'm just downloading & organizing pics* to make a real, well written post. But until that arrives, I find this intensely entertaining:

(Imagine then as two frames in a video clip. Or like those pages from coloring books that you cut out & layer & then flip through real fast, to make a cartoon.)
I may have spent too much time in the sun today.
*Also, the camera is either the electronics version of Jesus Christ, or the cat-bath didn't hurt it. Either way, good. Although I'm not looking forward to meeting the electronic Pontuis Pilate. I bet he's a toaster.)
And there are new pics on Flickr, see link on sidebar.

Monday, May 14, 2007

Oh Dear.

There has been an unfortunate vase/water/digital camera/cat incident, & I'm horribly afraid for both the camera & the cat... there can't be that much technology in the bottom 2.5mm of a camera, right? So sitting in a puddle of water won't hurt it, right? Ha. Haha.
This is where I feel I should begin wringing my hands, '50s housewife style, and saying "Dear, oh dear, WHAT is your father going to say when he gets home from work..."
The camera is currently drying on a pile of soft napkins. The cat is MIA, & I didn't actually witness the carnage, but we all know who likes to chew the tulip heads off of their stems...

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Heads Up, Expectant Moms

Be poised, always, with vigilance, to click "BACK" or "CLOSE" when visiting a new website in a serious search for information. As I have learned before (to my chagrin, regret, & horror*), the Internet can show you many things. In particular, lactation porn. Ewww.
Not that I actually saw anything; but as the site loaded, I could tell from the banners etc that it was going to be one of "those" sites. So I clicked "Back!" "Close!" "Ack!", and was so scrambled that I forgot what the heck I was looking for in the first place.
*Years ago, I heard a teenage boy use a piece of slang I was unfamiliar with. My curiosity wouldn't let it go, & after I had polled all my girlfriends, I asked Google. Google could have just told me, but nooooo, it had to show me. *shudder*. Luckily, Liana introduced me to Urban, which is a used-compiled dictionary of slang. There are many, many, many things described there, but at least there are minimal images.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Body Fluids Trifecta / "I'm Going To Have To Wash That"

Sadly, despite her best efforts, Amoryn did not win, place, or show in the Body Fluids Trifecta held yesterday. There was an initial strong performance with the suprise "Pee on Momma's Pants" move, executed with precision on the living room floor. This was followed by the equally unexpected "Spit a Mouthful of Undigested Milk into Momma's Nursing Bra". However, perhaps due to momma's increased vigilance, or Amoryn's lack of focus (she is only a month old), she neglected to spit up on any non-designated surfaces, thus failing to complete the third portion of the challenge.
Amoryn does win an Honorable Mention for her drive to soil laundry - she blew through three freshly laundered ensembles (two Amoryn's, one momma's).
Stay tuned for further tales of Sporting Baby Excellence.

Friday, May 04, 2007

One Month Ago...

One month ago, I was just getting into my bathtub, to remain there until 6 pm or so. While part of my brain knew that I'd have a baby to hold in my arms by the week's end (induction had been slated for Friday), a large portion of my brain was convinced that she was never leaving, and she would complete high school via braille correspondence through the skin of my belly.
Turns out, Amoryn showed up that very day. The festivities commenced just after I got out of the tub, had a snack, & spoke to the midwives.
"No, nothing. Maybe the odd twinge, but they've been happening all along. I'm going to go & have a nap, & then supper."
I learned differently.... I laid down for the nap, & wow! Contraction city. Four & three quarter hours later, we had a baby. Huzzah! My darling girl had arrived!
And with her arrival, she brought a lot with her. Some of which is an interesting array of noises, many that translate to the adult ear as "Waaa". (When really, it's "waa", "Wah", "WAAH!", etc.) I've gotten better at understanding, but I've also developed this list to check & diagnose issues:
1) Diaper? Fusses, howls? Initial sniff test, peer in diaper, change diaper.
2) Hungry? Howls? Mouth open wide? Binky being rejected? Attempts to latch to father's arm? Offer boob.
3) Gassy? Which end?
3.a) Burpy? Fussy, fidgety, flaily, hungry but still savage despite breast? Burp in upright position.
3.b) Farty? Fussy, fidgety, flaily, stiff belly? Gently massage lower belly, bicycle legs, & lay baby on side. (Adult also has option of laying on side.)
4) Overtired? Fussy, fidgety, flaily, glaringly wide open eyes? Walk, stairs, dance, sing, celing fan, bathroom fan, stroller ride, car ride...
5) Bored? This is new. Still in early diagnosis. Propping upright seems to help.
6) Imaginary Goblins Pinching Baby? Tough one. The IG disappear once adult shows up, but takes time for poor baby to relax. Poor baby is also aggravated by misdiagnosing 1)-5).
Not to say that all Amoryn does is cry & fuss, but if the crying & fussing isn't dealt with quickly, it escalates, and that makes it hard to savor the deliciousness that is our little mumbley girl.
I get the biggest kick out of watching her wake up. (So far, anyways.) She screws up her face, stretches, & waves her arms, & in general, channels EXACTLY how I feel about waking up.
She loves sunshine & ceiling fans. She is taking baths on advisement - the wailing has reduced and she might even deign to enjoy one in the future. She watches things more now, & smiles & chuckles in her sleep, and is starting to make eye contact. We're still waiting for the first full eye contact & smile, but that's okay. Judging by the sweetness of the sleeping smile, the real mccoy is going to knock my socks off & reduce me to a gibbering fool of a mama, trying to get her to do it again.
I'm already a bit of a gibbering fool, truth be told. She's pretty hard to resist; Am's used her super baby powers to hypnotize parents, grandparents, cousins, & aunties alike. Even Pat's bachelor coworker seemed fascinated.
All in all, she's fantastic. I wouldn't trade her for a million years, or even 8 hours of sleep all in a row. And for me, that's really saying something.
I think she's waking up; gotta go & catch the show!