Silliness & more Ethiopia!

My silly moment of the day:

I tried to flip open my cel to make a call – and somehow managed to hit a combination of keys that opened up the camera function. So as I opened my phone, it said:

“BOING!” (which is the noise the ‘camera’ makes), and I said:

“AGH!” (which is apparently the noise I make). And then I dissolved into giggles, partially because hello? My phone just boinged at me? And this is frightening why?

I also work in a cube farm, so I’m imagining what that sounded like to my neighbors. I shouldn’t have been surprised – Amoryn regularly finds shortcuts on all sorts of things – cell phones, remote controls, computers – that takes me to hitherto unknown applications or functionalities. Why shouldn’t I manage to do the same?
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At any rate, more words from my favorite broad abroad...
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From: S________
Subject : Ethiopia, Day 2

OK, I wrote a charming and witty description of what we did today, rife with detail and local clour, and this effing computer deleted it before I could send it. So to sum up:- We had fun.- We saw a 17th century castle. It was interesting.- We met some kids. They taught us a game like Jacks. We sucked.- I saw a painting of 2 women spinning and knitting yarn. I mentioned that my friend Kourtney and I do that too. They think we're nuts.- We saw 'Lucy,' a prehistoric hominid fossil widely believed to be the missing evolutionary link between us and monkeys.- We saw the Mercado, or market. It was loud, crammed full of everything (including baskets, spices, coffee, old tennis shoes, old plastic jugs, cows, chickens, and sheep, and everything else you could possibly think of) and layed out in absolutely random fashion. Loved it!- I almost got run over by a cow, running down the street outside the hotel. The salesguy helping me look for sunglasses grabbed my arm and hauled me out of the way. Cool! It's a gong show today because it's Easter here and the end of lent, and tomorrow everyone is eating all day. Hence the unhappy cow. I'm sure it would've run around me anyway (in the movie 'Australia,' pieces of which I watched half a dozen times yesterday, hunky Hugh says so) so no real danger. Exciting though. So tomorrow we head into the countryside and I'm not sure how accessible the internets will be out there. Will email when available. Later skaters,____

It Was A Challenging Day

Today felt like a long & difficult day. There was lots of good things - but these were nicely tempered by excellent opportunities for me to Learn Things. I'm not sure if it's the Universe, or just a side effect of this pregnancy, but my fuse is a lot shorter these days. My temper flares a lot more; it takes a lot more focus not to lose it. I can't remember if it was like this last time, because, well, I didn't have as much on my plate. And i think I was still sleeping like 18 hours a day. Hard to be angry when you're not awake. At any rate, here is what I Learned Today.
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It started off this morning - after 15 minutes, all Am had on was a diaper & her undershirt. She was happy, and she was quite insistent to "do-it!". Last night's pajama scuffle has led me to believe that she truly, truly means that she does not want any help from me. However, our likelihood of eating breakfast, getting out of the house, & to daycare & yoga on time was getting slimmer & slimmer. I was starting to feel mad - and I stopped, calmed myself down, and explained in my best Calm Adult voice that I know she wants to do it, and I know that she can do it, but after a while, we have other things we need to do, so she either has to put on her shirt herself or suffer me helping her to get dressed. (LESSON 1: Try new tactic* tomorrow: tell Amoryn That She Has Five Minutes o Do It Herself, And After That She Gets Help, AKA: Defining Limits In A Tangible Way While Still Respecting The Toddler.)
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It worked - thank heavens - and we got downstairs to breakfast, where she promptly had a fit because (I think) she wanted Daddy. Or the newspaper. Or water, no juice, no water, no juice, no NOT THAT JUICE WAAAGH! After trying to calm her, I just shrugged, set up her breakfast, then tried to get on with mine. (Lesson 2, previously mastered: Sometimes The Kid Will Be Upset & There Is No Helping Until She's Got Some Of It Out Of Her System, AKA: Give Yourself a Quiet Moment In The Pantry & It Will All Improve, Or At Least Not Get Much Worse, Provided The Kid Is Strapped To Her Chair & You Don't Mind Cleaning Up Some Cheerios.)

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This was sabotaged by the Terrible Smell in the fridge - I couldn't face the prospect of leaving that smell in there all day to fester. It showed up in the night, and after some cautious (gagging) exploration, I evicted some old grapes & oranges that were innocent of the smell but past their due-date, some scalloped potatoes from Easter that were a Bit Off, and some uncooked chicken breast that GYAGH, RETCH, GAG, *gasp*. Shudder. Looked fine, smelled baaaaaaaaaaad. (Lesson 3: Next time, throw out the damn rubbermaid container the bad stuff is in. No plastic is worth enduring that kind of smell. Also, bad raw chicken smells like rotten eggs - is that normal? How did I get to be 32 and not know that?)
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And this brings us to the only part of the day that makes me feel uncomfortable - so of course I'm talking about it. During Amoryn's post-brekky toothbrush, she was fighting back*, so I set her in her booster seat to finish brushing her teeth. And she kicked me in the belly. And I Got Mad. I was mad. We've been working on No Kicking Anything (Except Balls When We Play) for a long time, and I thought it was an established rule, that she got. And my belly, well, I'm growing another baby in there, so I'm a little protective of it. And my first reaction was to smack the living daylights out of her. My mammal brain (thankfully) jumped on my lizard brain's reflexes in time to arrest my arm muscles enough that it was a bit brisker than a loving cheek cup, but nowhere near a slap or a smack or a hit. And I felt awful. And still mad. And I turned around and roared out an expletive at the kitchen, because really, I didn't know how else to process; and I wasn't braced at that moment to NOT be angry about being kicked in the belly. I went and put my head back in the pantry for a moment, until I was in control enough not to burst into tears & I could go & comfort my now-frightened little girl. (It was the roar that upset her, I'm pretty sure. I've seen her smack herself in the face with books with far more impact. I don't roar much. I still feel guilty, though***.) (Lesson 3: Really not sure... although better to roar at the kitchen than at my child; better to let her cry for 30 seconds while I get myself together, than to push myself further & end up in a giant ole' heap of misery, with Amoryn in tow.
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How do you prepare for unexpected kicks in the morning? I was thinking of kicks from INSIDE my belly, but not for another couple months. Should I be wearing a umpire's ensemble for breakfast? I do know some people who are into that - baseball, I mean, not kicking at breakfast.)
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We were late to daycare & yoga, but I didn't care. Am hugged me, I hugged her, and that was a good thing. She was happy to get to daycare, and headed off to play & wave goodbye to me as I drove away, so I knew that I'd be more scarred by the morning than she. (Lesson 4: I'm bigger, and better able to process things, but she inherited part of her uncontrollable emotions from me, so I need to teach her how to deal with them in appropriate ways. Not really anything to do with daycare, but it sunk in about then.)
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My lovely yoga instructor smiled beatifically at me when I slunk*4 in late, and she (or someone else) had set aside an extra pile of all the props we needed*5. And - this was a delight - during an inversion called Sup-de-swami-kinsha (or something) - my belly popped out at me! Usually, gravity keeps it all tucked away fairly well still, but there was something about the arching backwards while upside down that popped Sandy right out at me. It was funny - like a preview for three months from now! (Lesson 5: Relax, and be in the moment. Even if the moment is an incredibly uncomfortable downward facing dog - when did my hamstrings atrophy so dramatically?)
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And don't worry, once of the (many) reasons I'm so taken with my yoga class is because the instructor specializes in pre & post natal yoga - and has done so for 7 years, through a pregnancy of her own, & teaches instructors as well. She provides variations of poses that are safe for Sandy & I, and once I'm too big to feel at ease in this class, I'm moving to her pre-natal class.
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From there to the office, with a quick stop at the LYS to pick up a longer 4mm needle - because Petal is expanding & desperately needs to be on something longer than a 60cm circular. Although - ha!ha! - once I was on the train, I discovered that - ha!ha! - I was actually knitting Petal with a 4.5 mm needle. So I just blew $23 on a non-returnable Addi Turbo LacePoint 4mm that I actually don't need right now - ha!ha! - and I'm stuck with either fighting with my too-short circular, or not knitting on the train. Also, I have a long-enough 4.5mm Addi at home - ha!ha! - so I could have fixed this problem yesterday. Ha! At least I a) bought a needle I didn't have already, & b) still have gauge. I think. Maybe...erm. I hope that I'm not going to learn anything else from this... (Lesson 6: Don't trust needles that don't SAY what they are, coupled with your memory, especially when said project is in your bag. Take it out & check - it's a yarn store, they should have some gauges around. Ha!ha! ANd don't tempt the knitting fates.)
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On the upside - Elann sent out their sneak preview for the next couple weeks, and I think I saw the yarn for Shawl That Jazz. I'll tell you more if I order it; but - and this is what I found auspicious - although the yarn is lighter than that called for in the pattern, I'm guessing that I would use a 4mm needle to get a similar hand of knitted fabric! Ha! (Lesson 7: Online memberships to email newsletters sometimes do pay off. So does optimism.)
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Work went well - I usually don't go to the office on Wednesdays, but the Cost Report of Awful Proportions needed some work. And what CRAP wants, CRAP gets. And I don't usually blog about my work - but this was funny. As I was proofing, ready to release the report to the client- I noticed something odd. I called a clever coworker over, and established that one of my formulas had corrupted somehow and added $1.8 million to the budget! Moops! Even funnier, it had been like this for the previous TWO issues of the report, and no one noticed! Well. After I wiped the tears of laughter from my face (and finished freaking out, because dude! My formulas! How did that happen? And more importantly - DID IT HAPPEN ANYWHERE ELSE???*6), I fixed it up, sent it off with a carefully worded "Moops" email, and headed home. (Lesson 8: Well, these things happen. And like the tree in the forest, if no one else noticed that $1.8 million, was it really that important?*7)
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I got home just before the man, and we both walked over to the daycare together to get Amoryn. And she was so excited, and so happy, and so full of delight. She was laughing & jumping up & down & hugging us; I think she was honestly more excited about it than she was about her birthday. It was the best part of my day, I think. (Lesson 9: Birthdays are a little amorphous, but being picked up by the two people you love best in the world? Well. That's something.)
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Then I did some laundry, and typed this all out. (Lesson 10: While you can wear jeans for a week, you shouldn't wear them after your toddler piddled on them, and sometimes it's better to get things out; out of your head, out of your system, out onto the Intarweb, out. I know some of you have had days like this - well, mostly, I admit the $1.8 mill is a bit of an anomaly.)
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And now I'm going to bed. Yay! (Lesson 11: Someties a good sleep will cure all ills. Or at least render them in proportion.)
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*Sometimes a new tactic is almost more exciting than an actual occurrence - because the tactic might work! It could be perfect! Gosh!
**She hates me brushing her teeth, & she loves her dad doing it. If he does it enough times in a row, I might be able to sneak in there once, before she realizes it's me, but then Bam! Back to wrestling & fighting & shrieking & head burying.
***Although, using a very clever yardstick a very wise lady told me about - would I do that to a stranger's kid? I think my reaction would be the same no matter WHO kicked me in the belly. Reaction, coutner-reaction, guilt.
*4 - Ever tried to slink into a yoga class, where you have to set up your mat right next to the instructor? I hadn't before today, but oddly enough, it worked very well, as everyone was inverted when I came in, so when people finally turned themselves sunny-side up, poof there I was, mat & all.
*5 - Iyengar yoga - it may look a bit namby-pamby with all the blocks & bolsters & blankets & straps & chairs, but OMFG, wo.
*6- If you're not a database or excel person, you won't get the true horror of this. Srsly. Worse than fast, daytime-loving zombies.
*7 - Is it ironic that the most zen lesson of the day revolves around capitalism? Does Zen even do irony?

Knitting Dilemma

Hello! Please pay attention as there will be a skill-testing (or at least, opinion-testing) question at the end of this.
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I am rarely warm enough. I tend to be in cold places (Calgary, Oct-May, my basement, etc.), and having a shawl to snuggle up in makes me warmer & happy. I've got two now - one that mom made, that lives on my bed, & one that lives in the living room.

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I've got a hankering for a new shawl. I've even found the pattern - Shawl That Jazz. While I did find it because of the Harlot, I'd been looking for a SIMPLE shawl pattern for a while. I don't have enough concentration or spare time for lace, yo. I'm also using knitting as my portable meditation to deal with the world & a toddler - who, although terrific, is teaching me almost as much as I'm trying to teach her.*

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I'd shortlisted it to a couple, but was still a little dissatisfied with the shape, the texture, or something, when I fell for Shawl That Jazz by Samantha Roshak (Rav link). Nice tapered shape, all knitting, no wrap short rows. Maybe a bit of an ordeal to cast on & cast off, but whatevs. It looks grand in variegated yarn, and I have such a weakness for multicolored yarn.

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It calls for a DK weight (or so), and I thought I'd found the perfect yarn & scooped up six hanks of it. Then I wound it all into balls, got gauge on my first try, and thought "Huh."

(Through the bag you can see my hot pink slippers that feature leopards. I look HOT when I'm at home.)

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I didn't like the hand of the fabric for the shawl I wanted in my head. Or rather, in my head, I did not like the hand of the fabric for the shawl that I want in real life.** Instead of trying to fool myself by changing gauge, then changing stitch count, then collapsing in a heap of tears after ripping out hundreds of yards of knitting, I listened to my muse, & swiftly & decisively repurposed that yarn (Cascade 220 handpaints, btw) into a sweater that will work grandly over my increasing profile, but should still serve post-baby as well; Petal, by Stephanie Japel. After four tries for gauge, it's cast on, & I feel good about it.

(Really very clever - two buttons along neck, so you can lap it over, or not, or leave it open & have nice lapels. I'm only about an inch in, but pleased. You can't tell in that shot, but I'd guess that she's about 7 mos along in the photo.)
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That's all fine for now - please, knitting muse, I'm not challenging you; I'm simply moving on to my next point of discussion. Please don't thrown any monkeys at the petal project.

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Back to the shawl in my head, that I want in real life. I'd dyed some yarn (same stuff that I made my red Liesl out of), and it's so wonderfully soft that I just want to roll around in it. I'd planned on a cardigan, but, the cardi, well. It's not really as tempting to me now as it was; you know how patterns sometimes wane in your affections. So now I have about 1200 yards of yarn in a weight that should serve, that would be delicious and snuggley for the shawl. The purples are quite variegated - this is working it's way from being a semi-sold to a multi colored, I think.

Here's the hitch - there is a color variation between these skeins. It's very slight, as you can see - no problem, if I was planning on making a cardi or something where I could alternate balls, so that any variations weren't apparent.

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But the clever construction of Shawl That Jazz won't allow that kind of jiggery-pokery, no. So, after contemplation, I've come up some options... and although I've tried, I can't get the poll to show up just below this text, but if you look to the right, you'll see an opinion poll named "Shawl that Dilemma...Should I:" Click on whichever option you think best; no logging in or anything goofy required. If my attempt at clever little polls won't work, then please leave me a comment!

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*Don't throw your food on the floor! Yelling louder does not increase comprehension or compliance! Agh!

**Sorry S___ & S____, S___'s mom - I almost left that there just to make you crazy.

***It's really a word: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/jiggery-pokery

Busy, busy, busy.

I think that I have realized - on all levels of my consciousness - that I will have less time once Sandy arrives.

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I say this because I'm actually tackling the things on my "To Do" list. Some, anyways, Today, I actually spent some time sorting out paperwork for our ongoing corporate year - instead of leaving it for once, maybe twice a year. That was good.

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I'm attempting to catch up on my photos - uploading, printing, mailing around, etc. Still in progress.

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I've also picked up/started a bunch of sewing projects. My knitting muse must be getting interference from the snow, because man! Project after project is not going well, is not satisfying me, or is defying expectations &/or attempts at gauge. I plan on asking you advice about much of that soon, Intarweb.

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So I'm sewing. Witness below:

(This is our basement/my studio. It's cold, but almost all mine, & I love it. It has a view of the yard & a walk-out door. I share with our library & the laundry. And access for the guest bedroom, too. I is very lucky. The flooring was what we registered for for our wedding; we had enough towels & toasters.)

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In the left foreground, please note three dresses: washed & shrunk,cut out & ready to be sewn, two for Amoryn, one for Sandy & I.

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On the stool, please note a pile of fabric, washed, shrunk, & destiny assigned: 1) flannelette, to back new throw for upstairs couch 2) glorious t-knit batik - gorgeous - in browns & purples - for a summer dress slated for wear to work &/or weddings 3) also glorious t-knit batik - gorgeous - in pinks & fuchsias, for a top & 4) the last of the fabric that matches the loveseat upstairs - recovering two of the couch cushions & making a throw.

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Midground center - a little blankie I'm making for Am - she loved the whole cloth of one of her little dresses so well that I picked up more, along with some tie-dyed flannelette. And some really sparkly accent bead/button things. She's never tried eating buttons off of the man's shirts, so I'm going to assume that she's smarter than Cebu (old cat), & go for it.

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Mid ground right - a pile of upholstery that used to adorn the couch cushions upstairs & down. Now in the process of being revamped into well, some other things.

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On the table, there is (among other things), the slightly corrupted accounting file for our company that I'm trying to resuscitate, instead of re-keypunching the whole year. I don't want to talk about it.

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But on the big chair, see? Those two lovely cushions, so nicely coordinated with the decor? Subtly lifting the colors of the big chair? They are my completed test runs on the cushions for upstairs. I hate upholstering, but I think I may have finally figured out how to remove some of the pain: a) multiple test runs & b) let go of any preconceived notions of "efficiency".

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The little chair in the corner - which currently features rust pheasants (oooooo) is also slated for a facelift of some kind. Not sure what, but I have fabric for that too. (All of the basement fabric has carefully been aged for 3 years or so - and they were all on killer sale in a clearance bin. Like $1.29/m ish. Wicked.)

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And I reorganized Am's downstairs toys - you can't really tell, but they're on shelves against the window. The shelves are the same as upstairs:

They provide easy display & access of toys, so that am can easily decide what she wants to play with next. Did you know, "Play" is one of her words now? I love how she says it.

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And how she does it, so thoroughly, as the photo above attests. She helps to clean up before bed though!

News From A Broad, Part I

One of my very bestest friends ever is on holiday right now in Ethiopia - and I'm torn between thinking "why would you ever go to a place where female genital mutilation* is popular?", vs. being green with envy. Her email's fall solidly into the green-with-envy column, and they're funny too, so I'm presenting her emails as guest posts. (Which sounds better than saying "I'm just going to copy what she said, 'kay?")
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Subject: Ethiopia!!! We're in Ethiopia!!! How Frikkin' Cool Is That?!?!?!
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We made it! And happily, the hotel has an internet cafe (whose proprietor is intensely curious about all things Canadian). So far, it's been a great trip, and quite funny at times. Every time we've told someone we're headed to Ethiopia, they ask us if we're going to get a baby. Ha, ha! Except they're not joking. We actually met a couple, Cory and Cora (they match!) from Manitoba somewhere, that are here to get a baby. Good luck - as B___ pointed out, it's a huge amount of paperwork to get a car into Canada from the States - the paperwork to get a kid in from Ethiopia must be staggering. Another funny thing is that despite travelling all the time, I totally gapped out on what can and can't make it through security, and they took away my bottled water, sunscreen and antibacterial spray. Then I got searched. Thoroughly. So thoroughly that other strangers from the security line were wishing me good luck and wincing as they walked by. Ah well. And the 17.5 hours of flight time ended up being pretty much totally wasted, as neither B___ nor I have read a word of the guide book. I did, however, watch "Bolt" and "Australia." They have individually controlled TV's for each seat on Lufthansa now, which means you can rewind the part where Hugh Jackman struts around without a shirt on again and again and again. Yay! I tried to get some phrases going, and say thank you to the waitress at the hotel restaurant, but she walked away while I was trying to pronounce it so clearly I wasn't making any sense. Incidentally, "thank you" is like, 25 letters long and mostly vowels. Our assimilation attempts are not looking good. Anyway, we join our tour for reals tomorrow and I think we'll try to sneak a city tour in as well. The weather here is lovely - humid and 20C or so. Periodic rain, but it's neither heavy nor cold so it's nice actually. I would type more about the lovely people and cool city and scenery all that crap but am about 5 minutes from a coma-like sleep so... People are nice. Totally lost already, city is big and constructed entirely in circles. It looks cool. So does the scenery. That's all I've got. Love/fondness in varying degrees to everyone!
S____
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Doesn't that sound so cool? More to follow.
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*Sorry for the heavy nature of this footnote - I know they're usually funny - but there is nothing humorous about fgm**, & the cultures & mentality that support it. Shudder. There are several charities that helps support victims & work at educating & abolishing; this is one out of the UK - Women At Risk . I'm sure there are Canadian charities that support the same; but I was frankly getting too depressed looking at Google. There is always Doctors Without Borders, which has been my favorite charity since I lived in Moose Jaw & my family doctor left to go & work with them for a couple years. And the Harlot supports them, to; with her Knitters Without Borders , she's raised $590 768 for Doctors Without Borders (aka Medecins Sans Frontiers).
**If you don't know what fgm is, & you're of a sensitive nature, maybe don't ask Google... It's awful. It's unreal. It's cruel. It's hideous. It's barbaric - and I really mean that. Donate something to a charity that supports marginalized women and pray to whomever that you & your daughters will never have to find out. Shudder.

Baby Pictures!

Oh, I just love a little skully alien baby. Don't you? So sweet. Less alien-like watching her when she moves, but the stills, well. Amoryn looked just as skull-y, and we all know how beautiful she is.

(Hi intarweb!)

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We (obviously) went today for the first trimester ultrasound. I wanted to see the baby, waving his arms & legs; and the man wanted thought it was best to do the tests.
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(Waving my arms!)
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Turns out, we're both happy - Sandy waved her arms at me, and kicked, and the tests had good results. (We don't know what Sandy is yet - but we're going to find out in a couple months. Until then, I will do my best to alternate pronouns. Grandparents, I know you like a surprise, but honestly, I'm so bad at secrets.)
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(Kicking my feet!)
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It was a bit of a complex thing, given that the tests have results, and the results aren't always positive. I honestly couldn't decide whether or not I'd want to risk an amnio, if there was an offer of one, let alone any further thought processing. Thankfully, my brain can now quit worrying at that, & I can happily bask in the glow of having seen my hitch-hiker, who I think already looks a little bit like his big sister.
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(Bye Intarwebs!)
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Don't you think? I can totally see Amoryn's forehead there. And what a baby! 56mm long (crown to rump).

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That's all. I'm a happy mom to a big girl, of swimming with her dad; and looking forward to meeting this new little alien baby. I'm going to go & celebrate by making banana bread. Actually, I was planning banana bread anyways, but I feel like celebrating, so... I'll probably celebrate by EATING the banana bread! Yes! That's a plan!

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PS: Tribal eyelet was totaly anticlimactic - solid bright blue or bright green all-over eyelet. Borrrrring. But I did scoop some great deals on material for two dresses for Am & one for me!

These things, they make me wonder.

I was just checking out the Fabricland flyer online - I'm on the hunt for ribbons & toggles for some small projects - and I noticed this:

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You might not be able to see it, but there, at the bottom, on the left hand side, is advertised the following:

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"TRIBAL RHYTHM EYELET"

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There are some things that just don't seem like they should be juxtaposed.... and tribal eyelet is solidly one of those combinations.

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This is what I think of when I think tribal:

Although, maybe you think of this:

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And this is what I think of when I think eyelet:

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(And the observant/clever/heirloom sewers amongst you are noting, correctly, that that is NOT eyelet. Insertions lace, with some pintucking, and...)

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This is eyelet.

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Although, given that eyelet frequently trims things like this...

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I think I can be forgiven for sneaking the heirloom christening gown in there.

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At any rate, I can't quite imagine what TRIBAL EYELET is going to look like, let alone what a person would do with it, 40% off or no. I'll update you after the trip to the store...

Oh, spring.

I don't like spring. I wish I could; I wish I could thrill to every little melt & thaw; but I just feel a little cranky.

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I know part of it is my allergy to mold, and spring is full of mold. Everything that died last fall, or that has been left in a snowbank, is now molding away, happy as can be. And until there's a couple good rains & some sincere growth of plants, it's just wretched for me to be outside. The plants growing sort of mat the crap down, & help turn it from noxious* mold into nice dirt.

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Maybe it's spring here in Calgary - in Saskatchewan, it would be winter, then all the water in the ditches would melt, and we could go puddling, and then it's spring, then summer. Here, there's some melt, there's some snow, there's some more melt, then there's the dirty roads full of pea gravel & dust & salt. Dust! Another bane of my existence**. Weather in Calgary is more exhausting than that unmedicated manic-depressive I used to date. (Sunny! Cloudy. Sunny! Windy. Happy! Angry. Happy!.)

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(We have a walk-out basement, & this is the side of the yard that leads down from the front to the back. I love it. There's creeping thyme that grows all up the steps, & most of the plants here are alpine varieties, with the exception of some asiatic lilies.)

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And intarweb, I have to admit - I'm feeling especially negative this spring because the man's plan to enlarge the garden 'a little bit' has exploded into a massive rework of the back pods. And I don't like it all. I like it just the way it is. I'm totally hung up on imagining the kids running through the pathways, shrieking in delight, and the man's vision isn't very conducive to that. I'm having a hard time puttng anything into words other than "NO BUT I DON'T WANT TO CHANGE IT I LOVE IT HOW IT IS DON'T YOU REMEMBER THAT I ALMOST MURDERED YOU THE LAST TIME WE HAD BRICK PROJECTS IN THE YARD?"**** . Not the best way to reason, I know. And I've carefully explored my motives for resisting this change, & it's not the change - I'm cool with the garden expansion***, I really am just in love with the pods just the way they are.

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(This is about half of the pods, and we've since changed ground cover from clover - which was completely NUTS - to killing the cover, which has been a challenge. The pods are actually a couple bricks higher - the insane clover was misleaing.)

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Part of my brain is whining "you should be more supporrrrrtive....", but dudes, I just don't like the idea. I adore the garden. And I don't care that it's taking the daylilies a little while to establish; this is only their third year cming up! And unlike a haircut, the bricks won't just grow back to how they were, so I'm really loath to say "Sure, let's try it!"

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What is potentially most upsetting to me is the feeling that the man is going to charge ahead & do as he pleases with the backyard, and pretty much ignore my opinions & concerns because 'he's right'. And "what else is a yard for but growing plants"? (Growing small children into big kids. Working well so far on Amoryn.)

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So, for now, bah springbug. Once it's nice enough to go to the garden center, and enjoy mulling all the little plants that we can bring to the yard, I'll feel better. Until then, *grumble grumble grumble*. I'm going to go * knit & try to recover my serene mojo.

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*To me. Especially this spring, where I have no recourse to OTC meds because I'm knocked up. All I have is Tylenol & a Neti pot. Tylenol doesn't do much for sinus allergies, and the Neti pot, well. I'm getting used to it, & it does help, but it's still a little bit of 'the cure is worse than the disease'.

**I'd like to claim that this is why my house could use a good dust - I'm leaving it be for health reasons - but if it is the case, my subconscious has cleverly cloaked that self-preservation instinct in laziness.

***After a very clear negotiation of firepit ease.

****It's true. We moved three or nine tons of brincks into the back yard, via wheelbarrow, and as there was enough of a supply, he bagean buildng, & I carried on with the lame duck wheelbarrow. I even had the brick lifted in my hand, and I was thinking "you know, I could stop moving bricks if ..."... Then I decided I needed a break, and went for a shower & a nap.

Not much to say today...

But pictures speak a thousand jellybeans, er, words...

Oddly enough, she wasn't looking at my knitting today.

Feb 09, originally uploaded by Kourtney_R.

Although my knitting does get fairly regular (supervised) visits from Amoryn, today was not one of those days. But it was a knitting day! I haven't been knitting a lot, because, well, sleeping has been pivotal, but my knitting mojo has worked its way out from under the cruel thumb of the 1st Trimester Sleep Fairy.
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It wasn't a solo knitting day, either - I spent a lot of the morning knitting on the socks while waiting for an appointment. An older gent waiting for his mother watched me the whole time, and we made a little small talk. I was very impressed with myself in that I did not knit myself into confusion, as has been my wont with the two simultaneous socks on two circular needles. I think there's an article or class that's called "Socks That Soar On Two Needles". For me, it's more like "Socks That Swear". Or, the "Knitter Who Swears At Her Socks"*.
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(Nothing bad going on with us, FYI - Sandy & I are both ticking along nicely, eating HUGE quantities of whatever we want - and the man & the little girl were at work & daycare, respectively.)
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After the morning, I was tired. So for a refresh, I stopped by my close favorite LYS, and spent a happy happy time petting yarn, & chatting. It was very restorative.
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This evening was the Knitting Guild! I was Very Tired, but went anyway, & continued to work on the socks. It was very good as well - remind me that I signed up to bring snacks in October, okay?
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And that reminds me... I need a snack before I hit the sack. Hm. Toast? Bagel? Cream cheese? Guacamole? Hmm. I need to further contemplate.



*Like "Dances With Wolves", but instead of Sioux (Cree?), it's allll curse words. Muttered, dire, unintelligble imprecations.

Hoppy Easter!

You know, I'm not always so nuts about certain facets of the Christian religion, but I dig Easter. Resurrection & rebirth are great concepts, & it's spring, or really close to spring, or at least close enough to spring that you can think about it without getting too bummed out.

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It's certainly nice enough to go to the zoo. The animals were all happy, & so was Aunt S____ as she doled out crackers to Am, Aunt C____, & S____.

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And with the long weekend, and family visiting, it's great to go to Ikea.*

(Hangin' with big cousin Z____, also known as "Na-na". Luckily, I don't think she's saying banana, as she can say it correctly these days, and also, when she couldn't say it, it was "BA-blahblahblah". Which I loved & kind of miss.)
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It's so springy, in fact,that you can move a yarn-skeining operation out of doors.

I'd like to say that I was shallow & cruel, and in envy of Mom's killer score on a yarn sale where EVERYTHING was $1/ball, I made her do it all herself. But I guess I 'm a good person & junk, because I skeined the MF** soysilk skeins, and didn't even threaten to light it on fire more than once. (Yes, that is the old Xmas tree in the fire pit. The man likes to save them & light them on fire, remember?)
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Speaking of the man,he's far too diligent to be off gallivanting. He's working on the deck.

He's got vision, drill bits, stain, masking tape, a step ladder, and no able-bodied helpers today. Maybe tomorrow he'll have more luck... (We did clear out of his hair though - which is almost as helpful, really, in some ways.).

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I suppose a lot of those aren't really about Easter... but there's always Easter eggs. Fun, creative, a good pagan symbol for rebirth & fertility, and also good for making deviled eggs.***

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This year's harvest photographed extremely well, but are unsettling to see in real life. We used brown eggs - there seem to be no organic white eggs, & I do have some standards.**** They didn't take the dye so well, and when I pulled out the baggie of non-washable crayons, they were in with the sparkle glue & glitter paint that S____ put in the pinata for Am's birthday. I figured anything designed for use by toddlers wouldn't be toxic enough to poison an egg through it's shell in two or three days, so we went for it.

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And in this photo, they have an alluring gleam. You can't tell about the hours of viscosity, the tacky glue dye spots, the creepy plastic-y finish & texture. They're really quite horrendous. I may see if they look worse in natural light tomorrow.
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These beauties are from several years ago - I love them, & pack them carefully & bring them out every Easter.

Should I ever have or make enough time for pysanky again*5, I will add to their number.

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But, I'm going to subtract myself from today's equation & go to bed now. I'm tired, the Easter bunny has been by & dropped off treats & hidden jellybeans & mini-eggs. Maybe, if you're lucky*6, the next post will feature pics of the great jellybean hunt of '09!
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*Really, I mean that. This time. Sometimes, Ikea visits are fraught with irony, tension, & despair, but this one was good. A little long, we should have brought victuals, or loaded up on a 50 cent hotdog before we went in, but still.

**No, not a brand name.

***Is that ironic? Making deviled eggs with eggs intended to help celebrate the resurrection of Christ?

****Sort of a sliding scale. It all depends. This year, healty, cage free eggs ranked higher than having really pretty pastel eggs. I think it was the right choice. The sparkly glue, I'm not so sure of though...

*5And a safer environ - the toddler & the cats are do not go well with the candle-flame & hot wax. And permanent, non-food-safe dye. And raw eggs.

*6If we're not lucky, photos of outrage & indignation. I don't always know how to call these things, remember the birthday?

Bah, humbug.

Oh, what a crappy day. Mostly, anyways. Nothing epic & grand, and in fact there were some great parts (take-out Chinese with the girls! Yayayayayay!). But the low-grade dreck is winning out.

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(Hmm. Not done whining yet, I still need to get a little more out. Sorry.)

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The accounting program that I keep our books in had some sort of mental breakdown, & started a new year each time I opened up the program. Since I (sadly) have evolved to the point where I no longer do all the bookkeeping in one fell swoop, this means that our fiscal year end takes us into 2012. This is a problem, if you don't know much about accounting. I am trying to avoid re-keypunching the whole crappin' thing, but... arg.

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Also, an unpleasant side effect of pregnancy is I cannot have any of the OTC meds that I like to use to make life tolerable in the spring (during mold season - everything hidden in snowbanks is rotting! Huzzah!). So I have a sinus headache that looks to stick around for another three weeks or so; usually once there's been a couple good rains & the streetsweepers, I improve.

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I've been feeling nauseous too... blerg. A little morning sick, a little car-sick, a little sick-sick, bleh. It really socks in about three in the afternoon. The only things that seem to be palatable for supper are pale starches. So, last night I had spaghetti with a little butter. Tonight, chicken fried rice. It is no fun, & hopefully just a brief phase that Sandy is going through.

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Man, I'm sick of me whining now. So let's change the subject to something that makes me happy:

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New shoes.

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I know that oxblood patent leather mules sound like they could be a tough pill to swallow, but looooook....

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Aren't they gorgeous! I want to pet their shiny, shiny surface. They are so comfortable. And they have such a nice, roomy toebox that I can wiggle my toes like crazy. I am anticipating that these & my Mephisto sandals will all that you see on my feet* for the summer & fall.

Cute, no?

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Also cute, no? (New outfit from Gramma D. Am took the vest off, though.)

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Okay, back to the dreck accounting. Meh. I'll try to round up more happy for the next post.

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*Exception for office outfits & maybe date nights.

Threatening Emails....

I take it you recognize this photo. If you want him back, with stuffing still intact, you must meet me at the zoo on thursday.  No cops, no federal agencies. Just you and the girl. And your  mom. And S.  And Z. But then that's it. You will have one million cheerios with you. or the stuffed dog loses his  stuffing.
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Take this very seriously.
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If you want to make the arrangement sooner, you can contact me  and we can arrange a dropoff in exchange for said amount of  cheerios.

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(It's a tough life, being THE portable, reassuring, adored lovie.  Good point is, after her bout with the flu (& their bouts with the washing machine), Am is happy going to bed with one of her lovies, not ALL of them.)

Oh, I'm just terrible at secrets...

You know, I've been a little remiss at blogging lately. And there's a reason - I've been working on something that I haven't mentioned yet. And this blog really is a little bit of a conversation with mysef, and a little bit of a conversation with you. And keeping secrets sometimes feels like lieing, & while I may occasionally lie, I really hate lying to myself. So I'm going to tell you all about this latest project I'm working on... It's going to be a while yet, but intarweb, I know I can rely on you to keep mum* about it.
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A little while ago the man brought me these from Safeway:
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And I gave this back to him**:

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And that, dear Intarweb, is why the lack of blog posts... any energy that isn't devoted to parenting a very-definitely two year old*** is being used up, um, this week: 1) sleep & 2) making bones & eardrums, apparently. (I feel really good - the only nausea I get is when my stomach is empty. And I'm also very tired.)
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For now, the baby's working title is Sandy - he was conceived in Maui after all. Sandy is likely NOT what we will name the kid for real; we will find out what she is ahead of time; due date is in November; and telling Amoryn that we're going to have a baby is a little like talking about next Tuesday. It just doesn't really mean anything to her, although she hears the words. (And yes, this is according to plan - not the Original Plan, but an Updated Plan suggested by the man.)\.

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(Oh, & for now, I would prefer to keep my office out of the loop - I have the sneaking suspicion that a maternity leave would look likea good layoff reason. I will tell them, just not yet. So, shhhhhhhhhhh, or sssssssssss, as Am says.)
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Now I'm going to go & have a nap, or a snack, or both.
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*Ha ha ha!
**I am touched/horrfied that the man bought the most highly advertised & digital test on the market. So sweet! So extravagant! At least it wasn't a negative, that would have been totally anti-climactic. And disappointing.
***"No! NO! NOOO!" Flail, flail, kick. Repeat as needed, until parent collapses in anxiety/exhaustion/defeat.

Make with the pictures, lady.

All right, I've finally escaped to the basement with the camera. (Does that sound weird?)

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I suffer from a condition wherein I have no memory of how much icing sugar I have already. Hence:

(I am ready to ice cupcakes. About a million, by the look of the icing sugar.)

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Icing accomplished! (Chocolate & yellow cupcakes.) (I'm not going to talk about the epic battle that was the chocolate cupcakes.)
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Birthday girl, at breakfast, with helium balloons. We decorated after she went to bed, & while it was a really nice surprise for her to see all the "boons", it was more of a distraction at breakfast than I had anticipated. Oh well.

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At the party, during the singing. This is just before...

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Amoryn is overwhelmed by it all. We'd talked about how everyone was going to sing to her, but clearly it was all too much.

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Hello, what's this? (Feeling better.)

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No, see, you can eat it, it's okay. (Still suspicious. That thing was just on fire, okay?)
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Ah, familiar territory... I know what to do with this!
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(Serious business.)
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I have several other awesome photos, but they all feature the guests, & I don't know how the mom's feel about internet publishing. So, rest assured, much cuteness & play, a little wailing.

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Today was fantastic. Amoryn was so much fun. She's really feeling better.

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She was also feeling like guacamole for lunch - clever girl!

(Seriously. That was a SMALL scoop, comparativey. She couldn't fit all of the others in her mouth.)

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And she played, and was so good at the shoe store with Aunt S_____ (she tried several on, but nothing caught her fancy). I found a super comfy cool pair of oxblood patent leather, erm, clogs, I guess. I love them, & will certainly share images with you. But that's for another (slow) day!

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(Incidentally, I am aggravated by my keyboard. It is a piece of crap - still new, new, new, and setting itself on caps randomly & skipping letters randomly & making me hammer on others, also randomly. It makes me look like I'm even worse at typing that I really am. Arg.)