I don't get it.

I stopped by the office today, Amoryn (in costume) in tow, to do a couple quick things that are due for next week, but I can't do remotely. I thought I'd also show off my girl, some, because that's always fun too. Say what you want about seperate work & private life; Amoryn is a huge part of my world, and work is a good chunk of it, so it only makes sense that they overlap. And I think it's good to establish a certain level of person-ness at the office, as in "I'm not just an office drone". I don't blog about my work, because hello, good way to get fired, but. Today isgoing to spill out of the "work" box in my head, into everything else, so hi, blog.

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Today there was some really bad news. My old manager - who had been promoted less than a month ago, had positive family things going on, and seemed cheery and upbeat all the time. He killed himself last night. I already missed working with/for him - he was a great boss. And now he's gone, gone. Not just on another project, or at another office. It's so hard to understand how he can possibly be dead, and how he could have felt so low. I guess suicide is always an irrational act. The last death of a coworker (a couple years ago, in a car accident), was jarring, beacuse he was a young man, but this? This was intentional. I just don't get it.

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I'm going to go & dye some yarn, and continue to mull how confusing life can be. At this point, I don't really feel like handing out candy, or dressing Am up again in her _____ costume (took it off to nap). Maybe I'll compromise, set the candy by the garage with a note that says: "Honor System: Have Two", and take Am around to the people we know in the neighborhood.

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There'll be a pic of her in her ______ costume in a little while. Trust me, totally worth the wait.

Once Upon A Time, In A Kitchen Far, Far Away

My living room and kitchen are completely covered in short, fine, grey hairs. So is Amoryn; so am I. I've vacuumed & dusted & vacuumed again. I'm sneezing & have debated lint rollering my face.
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And yet, I feel grand about this. Why? Well, for once, I got to make the mess. And all in the name of a good cause.
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Stay tuned... all I'm going to say is that Hallowe'en is just around the corner....

A-ha!

I'm back! I bet you didn't even really realize I was gone, right? Well, this is partially because I didn't really go anywhere, in the geophysical sense of the word. However, my Yahoo email was being awful about my password, so I had to reset it, and I wrote that down, but then I couldn't find the paper.
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True, Yahoo has nothing to do with this blog's log-in, which uses my Google account. I think. However, I find that by changing one password, it's like my brain is temporarily reset and I can't remember any passwords. Maybe a design flaw, maybe a sign of the raging inability to focus I am suffering from as late. Waterbug brain, skittering from here to there. Zip! Zip! Zip! All valid lacations, but no continuity, no sense of order! Zip!
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I was just trying to think of some examples for you, & got sidetracked by realizing that I've neither folded my laundry, nor unloaded the dishwasher. These are both things that Am LOVES to help with, but sometimes, I selfishly unload the dishwasher by myself, after she's gone to bed. Ditto folding clothes.
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I honestly am trying to be more focused, more coherent; it'd be nice to be more efficient too. No, I don't want to be a mindless automaton (although: fun Halloween costume!). I just want to feel a little more on top of things. I'm not sure if it's the dregs of the summer's depression (depression usually hits first as inertia... difficult to overcome), the idyllic autumn (which tempts me into lollygagging outdoors - I mean, a 20C day in mid October? Come on!), Amoryn's blessed molars (which wake her up, and wake me up)...
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At any rate, I'm not condemning myself at all; all three above conditions are valid conditions (especially the gorgeous fall days - wowza!), so I'm not beating on myself. But I'm trying to get gathered, and man! Deciding what to accomplish during Am's nap almost does me in. And I really don't feel like I have enough time to let go of multi-tasking - even as we speak, I'm googling an Xmas idea - although maybe I should take a brief hiatus on multi-tasking, just to get refocused a little.
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I just sent an email.
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I think perhaps it's the sleep interuptions getting my order in my brain all scrambly. I make lists, then put them in my pockets, then spend ten minutes looking through my pockets for the list, decide I must have left it at home, get home, & discover the list in my pocket. Really. It feels like jet lag.
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I just sent an email about the Xmas idea I was just Googling.
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And I think it's time to go to bed, instead of continuing to blog abut my theories about how sleep deprivation is my enemy.