Monday, March 16, 2009

Maybe I'm Too Involved With Battlestar Galactica


(Mom, you do know that I'm sideways, right? Also, mom, what are you doing? You're supposed to take pictures of me, not your...)
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So, BSG will be over next week. That’s good, because then I can get back to my usual Friday nights, full of hedonism. (As long as you recognize that hedonism can involve yarn.) But it occurred to me today that I might be watching too much BSG.
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I launched off some icy stairs in a parking lot today, and landed on my butt & my elbow. Icy steps, cellphone*, & my bag all made a bad combination – I’m grateful that a) I was wearing my grippy boots, b) I didn’t break anything, c) that I’m not 80, d) I landed on the fleshy upper but-cheek sort-of hip area, instead of higher or lower, like bones or organs or something, & e) several nice people stopped to see if I was okay, and none of them seemed to hear (or mind) my muffled (yet vehement) curse as I landed.
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I’ve been mentally moaning all day, every time I go to sit or lean against something. I mean, sure, I kinda always wanted a booty like J. Lo, but really? Massive contusion on one cheek was not really what I had in mind. I was in the washroom*, trying to peer around and see how much I’ve bruised – the only pleasure associated with bruises are, of course, watching their colors – and I caught sight of my hip.
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(This baby is like, 6 inches long. No lie. And less than one day old. You know you're in for a series of butt-self portraits, tastefully cropped - IF YOU'RE LUCKY! Hahahaa...)
This is what my brain came up with: “Mother of pearl, I’ve got the @ss of Jupiter!”
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Confusing? This is the “Eye of Jupiter”, or at least wat they interpreted as the Eye of Jupiter on BSG. And that's sure what it felt like.
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Maybe a little much BSG. Or maybe not???
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(Seriously. Check out the purple halo. This is one wicked bruise, and you know it's going to be a frequent visitor to the blog - you know, watching the bruise 's progress. If my elbow bruise really gets it together for some technicolor amazing, I may feature it as well.)
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Yes, I just blogged my own arse. I feel okay about it, it's probably a pleasant change from the toddler snot discussion, no?
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(Mom, you know they'd rather look at me being charming. Well honey, you don't elicit the same gasp that my bruise does. And you're sideways because I don't know why, & I'm not fighting with blogger anymore.)
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*It was early – & I noticed one of Am’s shoes in the car, so I called the man to let him know that those shoes, those shoes are Not What She Should Wear Today. (This was my attempt at a good deed – to avoid shoe hunt, that always ends in cursing. Don’t even ask me where EITHER of her new sneakers are; I don’t know.) I was even being super good, and calling on foot, as opposed to in the car. Universe, I'm not sure I'm getting what my message is supposed to be, here...











1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You totally have a fracking stellar a**,my love! ~c